Axes and Snares
by SkyLark89
Summary: AU: Johanna and Gale spend time together in District 13.
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **"Axes and Snares"  
><strong>Summary: <strong>Johanna and Gale spend time together in District 13. AU.  
><strong>Pairings:<strong> Gale x Johanna, Katniss x Peeta (mentioned), Finnick x Annie (mentioned)  
><strong>Rating: <strong>T  
><strong>Length: <strong>Two parts, approx. 7,500 words  
><strong>AN: **If you haven't read my other story, _After the Quell_, here's all you need to know: Peeta was rescued by the rebels, along with Katniss, at the end of the Quarter Quell and they got together sooner than in _Mockingjay_. Gale could see that it was time to give up on Katniss and he started seeing Johanna during their time in District 13. This is the story of that relationship, plus some liberties I took with Johanna's back-story.  
><strong>Disclaimer: <strong>I do not own _The Hunger Games_.

* * *

><p>"I've had enough for today," Johanna says, not even trying to hide her disdain. Of course she knows there is no reason to take any of her anger out on her head doctor, the only person who has really helped her since she was rescued from the Capitol, but she can't help it. She's upset and he's the only one around. She stands up and heads for the door. Today the doctor doesn't bother trying to call to her, to convince her that it would be in her best interest to stay a little longer and talk to him some more about her experience in the Capitol. <em>Experience<em>; that is how the doctor usually refers to it. Johanna doesn't know why he tries to sugar-coat the hideous torture that she endured. It certainly doesn't make her feel any better, and refraining from referring to the _experience_ in graphic terms won't make her forget it. She doesn't see how the memories will ever fade at all.

Johanna reaches the hall and slams the door behind her. She lets out a sigh of relief as she briskly walks down the hallway. Her room is far from this part of District Thirteen and she is eager to get back there and find some way to distract herself from what she was just telling the doctor. She hates therapy, even though it does seem to be beneficial overall. Talking about her torture during the sessions helps her to obsess over it less when she's away from the doctor, and it seems to have helped with the nightmares a little. She still wakes up from them, but has taken to gasping or crying out rather than shrieking. She hates the nightmares worse than anything else. If she didn't have to relive the horrors of her past every night, she might be able to start recovering from them. The nightmares make her angry because she doesn't know why she can't get control over her own mind and simply _stop_ having them. It makes her feel weak and she hates feeling weak. There's nothing worse than being weak.

But then, maybe she should be relieved that her nightmares lately have been about the torture in the Capitol. It's better than the ones about Lilla…right? Johanna almost laughs. What a predicament to find oneself in: preferring dreams in which you relive torturous physical pain to dreams about -

"Hey, watch it," says a voice.

Somehow, Johanna hears him before she realizes she's crashed right into him. She blinks a couple of times and steps back. She shouldn't be surprised, thinking about Lilla always seems to have this effect on her; it's as if the rest of the world doesn't exist when she remembers her. But now Johanna forces thoughts of her sister out of her mind and tries to focus on the person standing before her. It's surprisingly easy and she finds herself eyeing him up and down. Black hair, olive skin and gray eyes just like Katniss, but the similarities end there. While Katniss is small and thin, Gale is over six feet tall and has a sinewy build. She unknowingly licks her lips as her eyes wander over him. When they eventually travel back up to his face, it's obvious that he can tell she likes what she sees.

Gale must be used to being stared at with admiration, but he doesn't look amused or smug, like Finnick would. Instead he looks a little surprised and as if he's trying to understand what else Johanna might be thinking about, besides how attractive he is. She can't help reacting with scorn, as always.

"Well, what were you doing standing in the middle of the hall?" It's a stupid thing to ask, she knows. There are any number of reasons why he might be here. Perhaps he's waiting for someone or trying to decide where to go.

Gale starts to answer, "Katniss is -"

"Never mind, I don't care," Johanna says, cutting him off. _What is it with these guys and Katniss?_ Johanna doesn't exactly hate Katniss anymore; the girl is decent enough, she supposes. But all Johanna really sees is a little girl with basically no personality. Granted, Katniss isn't much littler than Johanna herself, but she is quite thin, while Johanna is more curvy and a bit stronger looking. And what's with the braid? Does a more boring hairstyle exist?

Gale's not smiling exactly, but he does seem amused now, at the way she interrupted him. Johanna is just starting to wonder why she's still standing here, when she was so anxious to get back to her room, when Gale speaks.

"I hope you're not planning on wearing that to the wedding tomorrow," he says, looking down at her revealing gray undershirt and worn out gray pants, "You're not supposed to take attention away from the bride."

Johanna looks down at her clothes and feels embarrassed for just a second. The thin material of the tank top, combined with the fact that she isn't wearing a bra, leaves little to the imagination. But why should she feel self-conscious? Plenty of people have seen her walking around completely naked. Is there something about Gale in particular that makes her uneasy?

Everyone is issued the same boring gray clothes in Thirteen. Usually Johanna wears another shirt over this one, but today she'd felt hot for some reason and left it in her room. She crosses her arms over her chest and looks back up at Gale. She's not exactly sure if he's mocking her or complimenting her in a roundabout way. And she wishes he wouldn't have brought up the wedding. It's another thing she doesn't like thinking about, along with the traumas of her past. "I'm not going," she says.

Gale's eyebrows raise. "Why not?"

Johanna stares up at him and thinks, _Why not?_ "Too many memories," she says honestly. She doesn't know why she feels comfortable confiding something like this in Gale, who she barely knows.

Gale nods, seemingly unsurprised. "I know the feeling," he says.

Johanna continues to stare into his eyes for another few seconds, then gives Gale a single nod and walks away. When she reaches the end of the hallway and turns to head down another one, she steals a glance back in his direction and finds that he's looking too.

Gale watches her disappear from his view and can't help wondering where she's going. He wants to talk to her again and is curious to find out why she was in such a hurry. There's something _interesting_ about Johanna; no one could deny it. He remembers her making some unabashed remark about finding him attractive and, at the time, he joked to Katniss that he found Johanna terrifying. But he didn't mean it, really. She was hard to ignore and she certainly took some getting used to, but Gale couldn't possibly feel scared of someone so much smaller than him, or someone so pretty.

He finds himself comparing her to Katniss. One of the things he loves about Katniss is how different she is from any of the other girls he knew in District Twelve. All those girls, too many to remember, who he kissed just about anywhere and everywhere he could get them alone.

Johanna's different, too. Gale can't help being intrigued by her round, dark brown eyes. Did any of the girls he knew in Twelve have eyes that color? He doesn't think so. There were the gray-eyed Seam girls and a few fair and blue-eyed merchant girls, but none who looked anything like Johanna. After how many girls Gale has been interested in over the years, there's really only one thing that can get his attention anymore, and that's being different from the others.

* * *

><p>The next day at lunch, everyone but Gale and Johanna rush through their meals then leave. Apparently Katniss and her little sister have plans to help Annie get ready for the wedding, and Peeta and Finnick have no interest in staying at the table once their girlfriend and fiancée, respectively, have gone. It's not surprising, really. Johanna assumes that Peeta and Gale have probably been nearly as awkward around each other lately as she and Finnick have. Johanna's tried to stay friends with Finnick and act like everything is fine between them, but he must be able to tell how she feels. Hiding the way she feels has never been a strong suit of Johanna's. Whether it's anger or unrequited fondness, she has a hard time keeping things to herself.<p>

"So…wedding tonight," Gale says, looking over at her once they're alone at the table.

"Yep," Johanna says, annoyed, and with emphasis on the word.

Gale half-smiles at her. "If you get tired of sulking in your room, I was planning on leaving after the ceremony. I don't really need to see Katniss and Peeta together at the celebration."

_Sulking in my room?_ Johanna is taken aback for a moment by his insensitivity. Then she realizes it sounds like something she herself might say to someone in her position, and her surprise morphs into intrigue. Still, she's provoked into reacting with spite. "It's strange that she prefers him to you," Johanna says coldly, but then she realizes that her statement, though callous, could also be taken as a compliment. She's clearly saying that she herself would prefer Gale over Peeta.

"I know," Gale says. He looks lost in thought for a moment, but quickly recovers and even smiles at her a little.

Johanna narrows her eyes and asks, "What were _you_ planning on doing after the ceremony?"

"Sulking." Gale's smile fades. "Unless I can find some company."

"Company…to do what?"

"Anything," Gale says, "just having company would prevent what I had planned."

Johanna can't help smiling, "You're right. Sulking isn't exactly the kind of thing that can be done together." _Together_…she hadn't wanted to be the first one to use the word.

"Well, I might come back _here_ after the ceremony. Just for a few minutes, see if anyone's around."

Johanna nods. "All right, I get it," she says, then she stands up and walks off, tray in hand.

Gale wonders what exactly he just did. A part of him regrets it immensely. He still loves Katniss and wishes he had firm plans to meet up with her tonight, rather than the tentative at best plan to see Johanna. But Johanna obviously knows how he feels about Katniss and doesn't seem bothered by it. Maybe because he's not her first choice either.

Ah, well. Maybe she'll be able to help him forget about Katniss, at least for a little while. That's the idea, isn't it?

* * *

><p>Johanna sits in the dimly lit dining hall, feeling foolish for coming here. The ceremony has to be over by now, so where is Gale? Maybe he decided not to come, or maybe he forgot about her, just like Finnick has. She hears a sound coming from the kitchen and feels curious, not afraid. She's never afraid anymore; no matter what happens, she's been through worse. Johanna stands up and heads toward the back of the large room, toward the door to the kitchen. She reaches it and peers through the window (knowing the door's kept locked), but no one is there. She can't help feeling a bit unnerved. The room is pretty dark and she was sure she heard something. She turns around, intending to leave and forget all about Gale.<p>

But there he is, standing only a few feet away from her. Johanna can't help being startled. She gasps, and her hand flings up to rest on her collar bone. "Where did you come from?" _How can he be so quiet?_

"The hall," Gale says, then briefly glances over her head at the kitchen door. "Trying to steal food?"

"No," Johanna snaps, "I thought I heard a noise."

"Well, you know the kitchen is haunted," Gale says flatly.

"Ha ha," Johanna says, and rolls her eyes. "I was just going to leave. I didn't think you were coming."

"Here I am," Gale says, then lowers his voice, "I'm glad I didn't miss you."

_Me too_, Johanna thinks, eyeing him up and down. He does look rather striking tonight. "How was the wedding?"

Gale shrugs one shoulder. "Interesting, I guess. Different from the toasting ceremony we would do in Twelve. What do you do in Seven?"

Johanna opens her mouth to speak, but then she remembers the last wedding she attended back home and can't bring herself to discuss the matter. "Nothing special," she says.

Gale nods once, taking the hint. His eyes never seem to leave hers and she can't help starting to feel a bit uncomfortable, but she doesn't want to look away, that would be like… admitting defeat or something. Gale smiles, just a little, and says, "What do you want to do?"

"Well…" She pauses to actually consider the question, then says, "I'd love to get out of this hole in the ground but I know that's not going to happen."

"We could try," Gale says.

Johanna smirks. "You have a plan on how to get past the guards?"

"Yes," Gale says, his smile growing, "I do."

They go up as high as they can in the main part of Thirteen and then Gale asks Johanna to wait down the hall while he talks to a guard. She's curious to hear what he's going to say to the man, but figures he must have a reason for asking her to stay away, so she complies. It only takes a minute or so for Gale to look over at her and wave her toward him again.

They're both let out and into the cool night air outside the underground of Thirteen. They walk over to the metal fence and then go out into the nearby woods. "How did you do that?" Johanna asks, once they're well out of earshot of the guard.

"You obviously don't know the status I have here," Gale says with mock boastfulness.

"Oh, right, Soldier Hawthorne," Johanna says, with emphasis on his title. "I forgot you were responsible for saving so many citizens of District Twelve."

Gale doesn't answer.

"How did you decide which ones to get out?" she asks.

"There wasn't any deciding," Gale tells her quickly, "it was just about who was around."

"Plus Katniss's family," Johanna says, assuming that wherever Gale lived in Twelve, it was not close to the Victor's Village.

"Plus them," he agrees.

"What is it with you two, anyway?" Johanna asks.

Gale remains silent for so long that Johanna starts to think he'll never answer, but then he speaks. "We've been hunting together for years, and we're…_friends_, I guess."

"Have you ever been anything more than that?"

"No," Gale says, and then they're both silent again, while they continue to walk through the woods. After a minute or so, Gale asks, "What is it with you and Finnick?"

Johanna is about to yell at him that it's none of his business, but she realizes just in time that doing so would make her a hypocrite after the way she just asked about Katniss. She can't really think of a reason _not_ to tell Gale about Finnick, but it feels odd to talk about. She's never spoken about it to anyone before. "We were close for a couple of years. I mean, he and I never saw each other outside the Capitol annually, but…" she lets her voice trail off, deciding that, though she's been incredibly vague, she's said enough about what she and Finnick once had. "It doesn't matter anymore," she continues, "but still, I didn't want to see him get married."

"I understand," Gale says.

Johanna decides they need to change the subject. "I love it out here," she says, "you're so lucky you get to come here to hunt all the time."

"I guess," Gale says, looking around at the trees, "it does remind me of home."

"Me too," Johanna says. They stop walking after a while, when they come upon a large boulder. "Did you know this was here?"

Gale nods. "Katniss found it."

_I don't want to hear about her anymore!_ Johanna wants to scream at him. But she realizes how ridiculous that would be. How can she be so jealous already? There's nothing between her and Gale.

"Give me a boost," Johanna says, wanting to sit on the huge rock. Gale interlaces his hands together and she steps into them, then climbs up onto the rock and sits cross-legged. With surprising ease and dexterity, Gale hoists himself up and sits in front of her on the boulder, so their knees almost touch.

Gale starts to think of what is likely going on at the wedding celebration. He can't help picturing Katniss with Peeta and feeling annoyed and bitter. It must be obvious, because Johanna asks, "Something wrong?" in a very suspicious voice.

Gale forces himself to stop thinking about it and tries to focus on the pretty girl sitting in front of him. She's wearing the black cloche hat that she wears every day. He remembers that her head was shaved in the Capitol. "You have brown hair, right?" he asks.

Johanna smiles sardonically. "If memory serves. It's dark, but with some gold in it."

"Sounds good," Gale says.

"I've kept it short for the last couple of years, but now I miss it so much I'm thinking of letting it grow out again."

"You should," Gale says unabashedly, "long hair is nice." _Like Katniss's,_ they're both thinking.

"I don't know what I'm going to do with it," Johanna says defiantly. She isn't about to let some guy try to tell her how to wear her hair. Gale doesn't seem bothered by her lack of interest in his opinion. In fact, he smiles his small smile again and then reaches out, placing a warm hand on her knee. Johanna looks up at him questioningly. Never before has she known someone who seems to react positively to her affronting and evasive attitudes. There must be something wrong with him…

Gale's eyes, which were on his own hand as he positioned it on her leg, now raise to Johanna's again. _She's really very pretty_, he thinks. The closer up he sees her, the more he can tell.

Johanna realizes that she doesn't know very much about Gale at all, and suddenly she wants to know. There's something about the way he's looking at her that she likes very much. "When did you start poaching in the woods outside Twelve?" she asks

"Poaching?" Gale says, one side of his mouth raising in a smirk.

"Hunting illegally," Johanna says quickly.

"I know what it means." Gale shakes his head at her implication. "I'm not sure exactly," he continues, considering her question. "My father taught me some things about snares when I was very young and I took an interest in them, but I never had to take hunting too seriously until he died, when I was thirteen. That's when I started going to the woods more often and then I would take the meat and trade it for things for my family."

Johanna recalls that he has a mother and three younger siblings in Thirteen, and she feels her eyes widen. "You must have had to do a lot of hunting and trading in order to provide for a family of five."

"I guess," Gale says casually, "my mother worked, so it wasn't just me who took care of us."

"Still," Johanna says. She can't help sympathizing with him. She knows far worse things can happen to a young teenager (such as being reaped for the Games) but finds herself wishing this hadn't happened to Gale. It must have been hard, all of that pressure. She's never had to take care of anyone and would hate to have that kind of burden. In fact, she doesn't think she could stand being forced to think of others as much as Gale must have. It seems so stressful.

"I had it better than most," he assures her. He likes the way she's looking at him though, as if she wants to comfort him. They're both silent for a bit, before he speaks again. "Why don't you tell me about Seven?" he asks.

"I don't really like talking about it." _Too many memories…_

"What about in the arena, then?" he says boldly, "I was pretty impressed by the way you handled those axes during the Quell."

"I don't like talking about the Games, either," Johanna tells him.

Gale smiles just a little and raises his eyebrows. "You're not easy, are you?"

"No," she says. _Might as well tell it to him straight…_

"How about if, just for tonight, you do your innocent little girl act again?" he suggests.

Johanna smirks, but can't help being flattered that he remembers her strategy in winning the Games years ago. "Just for tonight?" she asks, raising her voice a little and looking at him with big, wide eyes.

Gale reaches out his free hand, the one that's not squeezing her leg, and slides it around the back of her neck. "I like that," he says with a wry smile as he leans toward her.

"You do not!" Johanna says, and can't help laughing. But at the last second, she closes her mouth so his lips meet hers.

Though Gale has already kissed too many girls to even remember, he can't help thinking that this girl is going to be one who he will remember.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **I do not own _The Hunger Games_.

* * *

><p>The next day at breakfast, she expects things to feel different or awkward, but they don't at all. Not even after Katniss gets there. Johanna and Gale talk about some of their scars and then she manages to drive everyone else away and they're alone again. "Was it something I said?" Johanna asks Gale with an ironic smile. She doesn't like how long it takes him to tear his gaze away from Katniss as she and Peeta walk away. But when he does look at Johanna, Gale looks content enough to be left alone with her so she decides to forgive him.<p>

"Well played," Gale says, "but you know _we_ could have just left if you wanted to be alone with me again." He leans toward her. "You have something you want to say?"

"Yeah," Johanna says, "about last night…don't expect that to happen again." But she isn't serious and he can tell.

Gale smiles a little and puts his hand on her leg. Johanna's not really sure what to make of him. Sometimes, like now, he seems completely interested in her, but other times he's so obviously thinking about Katniss that she wants to slap him. But she tries to understand. If Katniss can have feelings for Gale and Peeta, and she herself can have feelings for Finnick and Gale, then why can't Gale have feelings for her as well as Katniss? Ugh. She can't help envying Annie and Peeta, who seem to the only two of their little group who have only ever loved one person in their life. No…Finnick belongs in that category, also. He's only ever loved Annie, and Johanna knows it.

"I have to go," Gale says abruptly, "weapons detail."

"Oh," Johanna says, trying to sound nonchalant, "see you, then."

Gale looks around the room and, satisfied that no one of significance will see, kisses Johanna on the cheek before standing up and walking off with his tray.

* * *

><p>A few nights later, Johanna is having one of her nightmares. She's running through the woods in Seven, trying to find Lilla. Then she sees her there in the distance, in her white dress. Lilla is leaning forward, with her head on a tree stump. Snow is standing over her, holding an ax. Johanna rushes toward them but it's no use. Snow throws the ax down and then there's blood everywhere; Johanna can't believe how much blood. The ax makes a kind of pounding sound that echoes, then repeats three more times…<p>

Johanna sits up in bed, gasping for air. She realizes someone is knocking on her door, and that was the repeated sound she heard in her dream. She's glad the nightmare is over again, and is poised to thank whoever is outside her room for liberating her from that horror. She quickly hops off her bed, goes to the door and opens it. Gale.

When he sees her, his manner completely changes. She knows he had some witty, seductive line planned, but it must be obvious how upset she is. He looks at her with concern. "Are you all right?"

"Sure," Johanna says automatically. She's not exactly feeling up for company and thinks about sending him on his way. But no, she doesn't want to be alone. "Come in," she says, stepping aside.

Gale enters the room and takes a seat on her bed without hesitation. Johanna quickly joins him. She's not sure what to make of his silence, so she looks over and asks, "You did come to see _me_, right?"

"Of course," Gale says. He knows what she means, though. Supposedly, Johanna and Katniss both moved into this room together a few days ago, but Gale is fully aware that the latter has taken to sleeping in Peeta's room. She made it pretty obvious earlier today day when they talked, and he knows about the nightmares she has; it only makes sense that she would go to him like that.

"She leaves every night," Johanna tells him.

Gale nods and gives Johanna a look that is a mixture of warning and annoyance. "Thanks," he says curtly. Then he tries to remind himself of everything Johanna has been through in her life. He tries to be understanding of her but she makes it difficult. "You can tell me what you're upset about," he says flatly.

Johanna wonders if she should. She's never spoken about Lilla with anyone in Thirteen, other than her head doctor. She suddenly can't help thinking that her doctor would not approve of whatever she and Gale have going on. He would probably tell her she's not ready for something like this yet, after all she's been through. But Johanna doesn't really care what he would have to say. She likes Gale and he's proved to be a welcome distraction so far from every other (painful) aspect of her life. _Maybe if I like him_, Johanna tells herself, _I should try to treat him just a little better_.

Johanna bites her lower lip and looks into Gale's gray eyes. _Yes, I will tell him_, she decides. "I was just having a nightmare about my sister…who's dead."

Gale surprises Johanna by reaching out and taking both her hands in his larger ones. "What was she like?"

"She was four years older than me," Johanna says, "she looked like me, I guess, only taller, but not much. She got married a couple of months after I won the Games and she was so happy. She was always happier than me and took such good care of me when we were younger. I know she would have volunteered for the Games in my place, but she was too old by the time I was reaped." After this little speech, Johanna realizes just how much she needed to talk about Lilla, and all those good qualities she had.

Gale seems interested and hasn't taken his eyes off Johanna, so she continues.

"I wouldn't go along with something Snow tried to make me do," she says. Her voice has started to shake so she clears her throat and forces herself to calm down before she speaks again. "Well, it looked like an accident, but I know Snow had her killed."

"I'm sorry," Gale says sympathetically. He looks like he is sorry, but doesn't feel sorry _for_ her. She's glad; she's never wanted anyone's pity.

"Yeah, well…" Johanna says, then lets her voice trail off. Before she even realizes what's happening, Gale's pulled her close to him and his strong arms are wrapped tightly around her. She can't resist hugging him back. It feels surprisingly nice, and somehow even more intimate than that kiss the other night. "It was her idea," Johanna says, "for me to pretend to be a weakling in the Games. It's because of her that I made it out of that arena. And it's because of me that she died." _Because I wouldn't go along with being prostituted out by Snow_.

"Whatever happened, it's not your fault," Gale says with complete conviction.

"You don't know -" Johanna starts, but is interrupted.

"You obviously loved her," Gale says, "I'm sure you would have done anything within reason to keep her alive. Right?"

_Within reason?_ She's never thought about it that way before. She will feel guilty and regretful for the rest of her life about what happened, but somehow Gale has just made her feel a little better. Lilla was always so protective. If Johanna had told her what Snow had tried to make her do, Lilla probably would have forbidden it; no matter what the consequences would be. That was the kind of sister Lilla was.

How can Gale be so perceptive? It's like he knows exactly what Snow wanted her to do, and why she had to refuse. Without really even thinking about it, Johanna finds herself pulling her head away from Gale's chest, tilting her face up and pressing her lips to his. She can't help thinking that he somehow manages to understand her in a way no one else ever has, and he really has the ability to make her feel better. Finnick used to do this also, but it's different with Gale. Gale makes her feel as if it's okay to think about these bad things in her past. He not only distracts, he consoles.

After a couple of minutes of kissing, Johanna feels Gale's hand slide up her shirt and along her flat stomach. She's okay with this, but when his hand starts to move further up, she pulls it away and breaks their kiss. "Not now," she says, and adds silently to herself, _Not while I'm still so upset. And not while you're still going to pretend I'm Katniss._

Gale nods, understanding. He feels guilty for a second, as if he was trying to take advantage of her in a vulnerable moment. But then he reminds himself that she was the one who kissed him first and he couldn't help the way he reacted to that. Besides, it doesn't seem like Johanna has vulnerable moments, really. "Do you want me to stay with you?"

Johanna is surprised by his offer, but quickly realizes that it sounds nice. "Would you?"

"Yes," Gale says.

Johanna manages to smile at him. "I might have another nightmare, and sometimes I thrash around in my sleep," she warns.

Gale returns the smile and replies, "I don't mind." And she actually believes him.

Gale knows he'll have to make sure to get up early, so he can be gone by the time Katniss comes back here for a change of clothes. He knows things are over between them, but somehow he still doesn't want her to see him with Johanna like this. Gale lies down on the front side of the bed, away from the wall. He sort of expects Johanna to put her head on his chest, but she doesn't. Instead, she just finds his hand and holds it in both of hers, resting it on her stomach.

* * *

><p>The second time Gale comes to Johanna's room is the night before Squad 451 is set to leave District Thirteen. She's annoyed with him over the way he was looking at Katniss while they were at dinner. Why does he still have to be so hung up on her? Johanna has tried to understand, and tried to remind herself that after years of friendship and closeness it must be hard for him to get over Katniss. But for some reason it's just really bothering her at the moment. She's gotten over Finnick, so why can't Gale just forget about Katniss? Still, she lets him into her room and he takes a seat on her bed next to her.<p>

"Sorry you got _me_ again," she says, with a glance over at Katniss's bed.

Gale sighs. Even though he knows exactly what she means, he says, "What are you talking about?"

"You know!" Johanna says, "I know you wish you were with her. I know I'm your second choice." She finds herself glaring at Gale. How dare he come here, tonight of all nights? What did he expect? Did he think that because he was leaving early the next day, and might very well not come back, that things would change between them? Was he expecting some kind of special goodbye? Well, that was not going to happen.

"You're not," Gale tries to say. He reaches for her hand, but she pulls away and stands up. She crosses her arms over her chest and then goes to sit on Katniss's bed. Gale starts to feel angry but he doesn't want to leave things badly with Johanna, so he tries again to make peace. "Not second choice, just a different choice," he tells her, trying to keep his voice even.

"Except you didn't _have_ a choice," she reminds him, "she didn't want you."

Gale begins to return Johanna's glare. "No more than Finnick wanted you," he says coldly.

"Get out!" Johanna says loudly, but without shouting outright. "Why did you come here? What were you expecting?"

"I wanted to say goodbye," Gale says. He doesn't raise his voice, but somehow manages to sound incredibly angry and in spite of herself Johanna feels a little afraid of him. She's never seen him like this, his eyes hard and fiery. "I know what you're doing," he continues, "we both know I might not be coming back and you're trying to make that easier on yourself."

"Right," Johanna says, with a callous laugh. "You have me all figured out, don't you? Just because I told you some things about my past! Well, you don't know anything about me!"

"Fine," Gale says, standing up, "and I don't want to know anymore." In seconds, he's made his way to the door, opened it and gone out, slamming it behind him.

Johanna realizes she's gritting her teeth and tries to stop. She storms back over to her bed, rips the covers down and throws herself onto it.

* * *

><p>The next time Johanna and Gale see each other after this is in Snow's mansion. They've both been given a room to stay in. The whole Capitol is in an uproar over Katniss's assassination of Coin, and both Johanna and Gale have heard enough talk about the whole situation and have returned to the mansion for the night. Johanna can't sleep and finds herself wandering into an upstairs living room near her bedroom. She's already several steps in the door when she sees Gale, standing by a huge window that overlooks the Capitol. He sees her enter the room out of the corner of his eye and turns to face her. Gale's hard stare and silence make it clear that he's still angry over their argument.<p>

Johanna wishes he would say something. She knows she was wrong, but still wants him to be the one to try to make amends. It would prove that he does care about her, in spite of his feelings for Katniss. But he won't say a word and she can't stand the silence any longer.

"Hi," Johanna says.

He seems to hesitate, then his face softens, just slightly, and he says, "Hi." She slowly walks further into the room and stands next to him at the window.

_I'm sorry_, she wants to say, _I'm sorry I was so cruel, and you were right about what I was doing. I couldn't stand the thought of losing someone else who I care about so much. Yes, I really care about you, and now that we're both here and you're still alive somehow, I can finally admit that to myself for real. This is just how I am…every time I love someone, I lose them. It's become so hard for me to love and I thought I never would again, but you make me want to try._

But she can't say all that, no matter how true it is. Instead, she just says the first part, "I'm sorry," and she hopes it will be enough and that the rest will be implied by her apology.

Gale opens his mouth to speak, but then closes it again as he continues to stare at Johanna. He seems to be trying to force his hard expression to soften and eventually it does. He tentatively opens his arms and she goes to him without hesitation. It feels wonderful to be close to him like this again and she hates herself for what she's done and only hopes it's not too late. It wasn't until he left Thirteen that she realized how important he had become to her. She can't believe how much she's missed him.

Now, having received some encouragement, Johanna adds, "You were right."

Gale still doesn't say anything, but after a few seconds, she feels his hand under her chin and she pulls her head away from his chest. He tilts her face up toward his, so that their eyes can't avoid meeting. She almost expects him to kiss her, but he doesn't.

"I know it's too much to expect that you won't do something like that again," Gale says, "so I won't ask you to promise that now. But will you at least _try_?"

"Yes," she says, the moment he's done talking, "I want to try…I will. I promise to try."

It's now that he kisses her, on her forehead, and then wraps his arms around her again, tighter than before. He's still not recovered completely from their fight, but that's okay. She can be patient with him, too. It's worth it. He's worth it.

"I'm going to District Two," Gale says, his voice perfectly even.

"For good?" Johanna asks.

"Maybe," Gale tells her, "for now, at least. There's a job I plan to take there."

Johanna waits to hear more and tries not to feel disheartened yet over the way he said '_I'm_ going.' But Gale seems to be done speaking. She doesn't want to ask outright what his intentions are with her, so she just says, "And?"

"I'd like you to come with me," he says.

"Even after everything…"

"Even after everything," he confirms.

Johanna can hardly believe this. She never imagined that things with Gale would progress to this point; it seems too good to be true. He must really care for her if he wants to take her with him so they can start their new lives together. She pulls back enough to look up at him again, and reaches up to touch his face. He gives her that little smile of his. She knows things will be different now. It almost seems like too much to hope for, but there is a seemingly rational voice inside of her that is telling her it's okay to be happy again. That she can be with Gale and nothing will happen to him. He won't be taken away from her, unless she does something to push him away. She surprised at how easy things with him have been, with the exception of that one night. She's not used to anything being easy.

"Yes," she says, suddenly desperate to get the words out, "I would love to come with you." _Love_…she hadn't wanted to be the first one to use that word, either.

Now Gale smiles for real, and Johanna can't help smiling back. Strangely, Johanna finds herself thinking of the last time she and Gale were both in the Capitol. She was incredibly damaged from her torture so her memories of this are vague at best, but she somehow remembers Gale being there, with some others, and helping to get her out of the place where she was imprisoned. A thought occurs to her. "Thank you," she says.

Gale looks quizzical. "Your welcome…for what?"

Johanna smiles. "For getting me out of this place before."

Gale nods. "Oh, that. Do you even remember it?"

"Not really, but that's not the point," Johanna says.

"Well," Gale says, "I was only following orders, really." He pauses to place his hand on the side of her neck, so his thumb can stroke her jaw, then adds, "I never imagined I'd get anything out of it, personally."

"I wish I remembered it better," Johanna says, "just the part where you got there, I mean."

"Not much to remember," Gale tells her.

_Still_, she thinks, _it was the first time I saw you and I want to remember it_. She decides that she will make a point of remembering everything, relating to Gale, from here on out. Maybe…just _maybe,_ if she can make enough good memories to focus on, the bad ones won't seem quite so bad anymore. It's worth a try, at least.

* * *

><p><strong>The End<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Thanks for reading!


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